
It is a story about a man who would have to navigate ending a relationship with someone with whom he has a child and the obstacles ahead. It channelled real emotions that I was feeling, and the storytelling reminded me of my own. This song felt like a revelation from the scriptures. I was surprised to know that someone else experienced the same level of toxicity that I had. It felt good no longer being alone in the struggle of co-parenting and resentment from my past decisions. Like mother, I would belt out the chorus, but in the shower and also like mother, I would perform as if my ex was right in front of me using Ty Dolla Signs words as if there were my own. It was the response that I had been waiting for. The song’s sped-up, uptempo beat creates the perfect clapback ambience, making it the ideal response to Badu’s down temp tranquillizing original. Only it was about fourteen years too late. On Ty’s version, I get the advice I wish I had before meeting my older daughter’s mother. Not being able to meet Badu’s expectations, she breaks up with her boyfriend, suggesting he be with his friends who keep most of his time, specifically “Tyrone.” Badu complains that there isn’t a balance in their relationship and compares the amount of sex her boyfriend asks for versus the money he gives her. These acts were measured by the time and amount of money their partner spent on them. The iconic song was an anthem for women who felt unappreciated and mistreated by their partners. She would keep the song on repeat until she memorized the lyrics while subliminally letting me know the emotions she was feeling in the present. She sang to the vanity mirror as if she was performing to my stepfather.

It felt like my mother’s anthem how she would belt out the chorus while doing her makeup.

The Advice I Wish I Had Fourteen Years AgoĮrykah Badu’s Tyrone song came out in nineteen ninety-seven on her “Live” album.
